Corny+Math+Jokes



Why Was SIx Afraid Of Seven??

- Because Seven "Eight" Nine

Q: What does the zero say to the the eight? A: Nice belt!

Q: What does a mathematician present to his fiancée when he wants to propose? A: A polynomial ring!

Q: Whats 2k+k? A: 3000!!!!

There are two groups of people in the world; those who believe that the world can be divided into two groups of people, and those who don't... (



teacher: what is 7 times 6? student: 42 teacher:now what is 6 times 7? Student 24 (x

Q: Why did the topologist's marriage fail? A: Because he thought that arbitrary unions were open

The math professor's six-year-old son knocks at the door of his father's study. "Daddy", he says. "I need help with a math problem I couldn't do at school." "Sure", the father says and smiles. "Just tell me what's bothering you." "Well, it's a really hard problem: There are four ducks swimming in a pond, when two more ducks come and join them. How many ducks are now swimming in the pond?" The professor stares at his son with disbelief: "You couldn't do that?! All you need to know is that 4 + 2 = 6!" "Do you think, I'm stupid?! Of course, I know that 4 + 2 = 6. But what does this have to do with ducks!?"



Q: What does the little mermaid wear? A: An algae-bra

Number two said to number three: "Boy, number 6 is really bad news. He's always in trouble." Number three replied, "What do you expect. He's a product of our times!"

Ok, let me have it!

Q: What is the difference between a Ph.D. in mathematics and a large pizza? A: A large pizza can feed a family of four...

SHOPPING MATH A man will pay $20 for a $10 item he needs. A woman will pay $10 for a $20 item that she doesn't need.

Why was the Math book unhappy? It had too many problems !

Question: "How many seconds are there in a year?" Answer: "Twelve, January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, ...

**A boy was teaching a girl arithmetic**, he said, it was his mission. He kissed her once; he kissed her twice and said, “Now that’s addition.” In silent satisfaction, she sweetly gave the **kisses back and said**, “Now that’s subtraction.”  Then he kissed her, she kissed him, without an explanation.  And both **together smiled and said**, “That’s __Multiplication__ .” Then her Dad appeared upon the scene and made a quick decision. He kicked that boy **three blocks away and said**, “That’s long division!”











LITTLE BOY: "My math teacher is crazy". MOTHER: "Why?" LB: "Yesterday she told us that five is 4+1; today she is telling us that five is 3 + 2."

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHH ;))

Knock-Knock Whos There ?? 3.14 3.14 Who ?? Pi !!!!!!!!!!!

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, and asked, "What are the grounds for your divorce?"

She replied, "About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by."

"No," he said, "I mean what is the foundation of this case?"

"It is made of concrete, brick and mortar," she responded.

"I mean," he continued, "What are your relations like?"

"I have an aunt and uncle living here in town, and so do my husband's parents."

He said, "Do you have a real grudge?"

"No," she replied, "We have a two-car carport and have never really needed one."

"Please. . ." he tried again,"is there any infidelity in your marriage?"

"Yes, both my son and daughter have stereo sets. We don't necessarily like the music, but the answer to your question is yes."

"Ma'am, does your husband ever beat you up?"

"Yes," she responded, "about twice a week he gets up earlier than I do."

Finally, in frustration, the judge asked, "Lady, why do you want a divorce?"

"Oh, I don't want a divorce," she replied. "I've never wanted a divorce. My husband does. He says he can't communicate with me !!" HAHAHAHAQHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHA ;))



Q : What Did The Triangle Say To The Circle A : Your Life Is Point Less







The names of three males are interlettered below. Can you find them?

T I C H S E M O R I B A T H S T S T Y I A O P H E N R

This morning I saw an old math student of mine, dressed in a beautiful suit and getting into a Rolls Royce. I walked up and asked him if he remembered me and he said yes. I said, "I don't like to mention it, but you were possibly the worst math student I ever taught, but you look like you're doing OK for yourself" "Yes", he said. "I buy steaks at the market for $1 and sell them around the restau- rants for $6. I'm only making 5% profit, but it's turned out pretty well really"
 * A Former $tudent Makes Good **-



Math jokes if you get them you probally dont have any friends.







LOL Senor Wengert